One of the hardest jobs in the world is working to keep your marriage alive and kicking. Before you marry and after the happy day you look at everything through rose tinted glasses. You are so sure that now you have said “ I Do “ you are going to go on this magical journey with the love of your life. But unfortunately life doesn’t work that way in the real world. Over time people can change and the happy life you envisaged has now started to fall apart.
Children come along and your relationship starts heading in a different direction to what you dreamed of when you first got married. Financial problems lead to disagreements and conflict which can impact on the whole family.
Unrealistic expectations:
Changes are part of life that happens to everyone and these changes have to be accepted. Nothing stays the same forever. So if you have the expectation that your partner is going to be the same as the day you got married you are heading for disaster. If you imagined that you would never fight, that your children are perfect and that the romance will last forever then you are still wearing those rose tinted glasses. Marriage is always a work in progress and you need to see things as they really are.
Becoming too comfortable with your partner:
Has the intimacy started to suffer in your marriage. Are you beginning to act more like friends than a married couple. If the answer is yes you are heading down the road to divorce unless you take a step back and see the problem for what it is. If the romance has gone out of your marriage then you need to get it back and talking about it with your partner is the first step. The butterflies may have gone but the love and respect should still be there. Talk to each other and come up with some ideas on how to put that spark back into your marriage.
Bad financial decisions:
Money can be the root of all evil but managed properly it can give you a comfortable life and security. If one partner is spending more than is necessary and the money coming in is not enough to cover bills and other essentials like food and the children’s school uniforms this is going to cause a lot of arguments that can lead to resentment and frustration on the part of the partner that is earning the money. You also may have secret debt like a credit card that your partner knows nothing about because of a refusal to give you enough money to cover your expenses. All these problems need to be addressed or you may find divorce is beckoning.
Communication problems:
This can happen if one partner has a different perspective on how to handle issues than the other partner. Being afraid to confront the problems could be because one partner has a short temper and you feel like you are always walking on eggshells and you don’t want to enflame the situation any more than is needed. Either way this lack of communication can lead to problems that may become insurmountable and no matter what you do it could already be too little too late. Divorce is could be waiting in the wings.
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